Positive Peer Pressure

Peer pressure can be positive as well and can be used in various ways to encourage kids to help others.  Below are a few examples of activities that a teacher or school counselor could do in a classroom:

 

Negative peer pressure can lead to bad and risky behaviors.  However, positive peer pressure can be used to encourage individuals to engage in good behaviors as well.  One likely example of positive peer pressure is if your children are involved in clubs at school or sports.  There is likely a good chance that if your kid's friends were not involved in those sports or clubs, that your child would not be either.  A group, like a support group, for example, will reward positive behavior and help to support and encourage that behavior.  Peers can encourage risky and bad behavior but they can also help support kind, good behavior.  When positive peer groups do good things, they can create a "norm" that others will then want to replicate.  These positive peer groups may also help to inspire others in acts of altruism to gain the respect and admiration of their peers (Rosenberg, T., 2013).

Wernick, et al, (as cited in Rosenberg, T., 2013) explored what persuaded children to take the initiative and act when someone is being bullied.  They found that when a child steps up and intervenes with an act of bullying, then others will be encouraged to start engaging in similar behaviors.   This set a kind of a social norm for other children to know that it was "okay" to step in and let the bully know that they were not going to be a bystander anymore and they did not accept this kind of behavior.

We, as parents, engage in positive peer pressure quite when our kids are little.  I often found myself saying things to my kids like, "Look.  Ava can write her name.  Don't you want to write your name too?" or "Your sister is wearing a pretty dress to church.  Don't you want to wear a pretty dress too?"   We do this to get our kids to eat their vegetables or try new sports or activities.  Then, when they get older, we use it against them.  "Just because Ava is doing that, does not mean that you should do that."  I often think it can be pretty confusing for kids.  But, now, looking at it in this light, I see that I was using positive peer pressure early on.  Then, later on in their lives we try to fight against the negative peer pressure brought about by their friends and classmates.

I remember what it was like as a teen.  I thought it was a very tough and confusing time.  I don't think I had a great self-esteem and I succumbed to a lot of risky behaviors at a pretty early age.  I don't really feel as though my friends directly pressured me, as much as indirectly pressured me.  They never said things like, "Come on and try it.  Are you scared?"  They just engaged in risky behaviors and since I was around them, I also engaged.  I think my fear was about not being perceived as "cool" or that I might "miss out" on something fun and exciting.

Below are some links that may be using for parents and kids regarding peer pressure and self-esteem:

http://tweenparenting.about.com/od/socialdevelopment/a/PeerPressure.htm

http://www.kidpointz.com/parenting-articles/tweens-teens/peer-pressure/

http://teenshealth.org/teen/your_mind/emotions/self_esteem.html

Teachers and counselors may find the following links useful in dealing with peer pressure and self-esteem in children and teens:

http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/j.2164-4683.1997.tb00373.x/abstract

http://www.thecoolspot.gov/documents/2peerpressurebagoftricks%20final%20edits%2010-31-07mg.pdf

http://www.goodcharacter.com/BCBC/Pressures.html

Rosenberg, T. (2013).  Harnessing positive peer pressure to create altruism.  Social Research, 80(2), 491-510. C3.     Retrieved from http://search.proquest.com/docview/1445001638?accountid=8289